Im kindof scared. For the last few days i have actually been feeling hungry. This is despite eating what is on my food plan. It would now be easier than ever to lose control, i havnt lost control in so long, i cant remember the last time i slipped up. There have been times where i have had to eat more because of the people im with forcing me in restaurants etc. But i have not lost control before, and im terrified it will happen soon and i will feel hungry and just eat and eat.
I have heard about people who have had anorexia and then developed the bulimia. I have already experience that disorder and i REALLY dont want to go back there. I dont want to be purge-non binge either, beacuse then i will probably get fat. ugh i hate this feeling of hunger which i once revelled in. It feels dangerous now, not safe like it used to.
I suppose i will just have to watch myself.
In other news, today was another birthday and another cake. Did i eat any? no. Did everyone else eat some? yes. :'(
Sophie x
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